Hell's Gate

Hell's Gate

Death Valley, CA

Reviewed April 15th, 2005

Fade in to a scorching bright sun in a cloudless sky. Pan down to the bleached white cattle skull resting on a barren landscape. A scorpion jitters from it's shadow while vultures shriek overhead. A scraggly bearded barefoot man with tattered capri's emerges among the shimmering mirages over the horizon. Stumbling left and right, he slowly opens his mouth. Nothing comes out. His eyes grow large in desperation. This man has been stranded in the desert for days, he's probably dying of thirst. Actually, he has to use the restroom. This restroom must look like paradise to him. Hell's Gate? More like Heaven's Gate.

RESTROOM RATING: 4
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