Restroom Ratings » gas station

Texaco

Jon — Sat, 07 Nov 2009 04:30:43 +0000

The mens bathroom at this roadside gas station appeared to have been propped up by stagehands overnight.. perhaps the result of a single unisex bathroom no longer meeting their needs. Whatever the case, the bathroom was obviously not designed under ideal conditions. The lack of a working lock on the door made for a pretty tense urination. Often times, I am able to prop my foot against the door to prevent unwanted entry but the door was much too far to reach without using GO-GO-GADGET gimmicks.

In addition, the flickering flourescent lights were painfully annoying.

Shell

Jon — Tue, 30 Nov 1999 00:00:00 +0000

You always know you’re in a classy establishment when the outside is emblazened with the words "CHEESE" and "LIQUOR". Of course in Wisconsin, establishments of this sort are all but uncommon – speckling the interstate from Hudson to Kenosha. The highlight of this particular lavatory had to be the bountifully stocked vending machines… and when I say vending machines – I’m not talking about Pepsi and Gardettos.

The overall cleanliness was a bit tepid with refuse on the floor and various liquids (water and urine being the most popular) aspersed here and there. However, this restrooms savior was the shiny red and black tile which added a certain flair without sacrificing tact.

Mobil

Jon — Tue, 30 Nov 1999 00:00:00 +0000

Wisconsin Dells, "Las Vegas of the Midwest". Home to the Infamous Tommy Bartlett Thrill Shows, the worlds largest water park and scenic tours with amphibious vehicles. However, this restroom failed to live up to the glitz and glamour I was expecting. Located just a few blocks from the core of Main Street (rightly, some call it Bourbon Street), it is quite amazing just how ordinary and bland this restroom managed to be. Cudos, tho, for the nod to 70’s color schemes with the harvest yellow dividers.

Holiday – Lowertown

Jon — Tue, 30 Nov 1999 00:00:00 +0000

Fecalmatter. It’s a part of our lives; something we deal with on a daily basis. Everybody poops. It’s a fact of life. One might think we would quickly glance over something so common and routine for us. I think that’s what I find most compelling about my reaction to finding a clumpy 6-inch terd on the toilet at this restroom. I reacted first with horror, then intrigue. Then I started laughing. As a restroom critic, this is a beautful moment to come across. I nearly cried.

I began to wonder upon what circumstances this neatly curled chunk of dung came to rest on the toilet rather than in it. What kind of person performs an act like this? Were they even aware that they did it?

Terd’s aside, this bathroom featured a few redeeming elements. There was a baby changing station, a nice framed illustration of a sailboat, and newer accessories. That was not enough to make up for the muddy floor covered with toiletpaper and of course… our little brown friend.

Super America – Lowertown

Jon — Tue, 30 Nov 1999 00:00:00 +0000

As a force of habit, I often find myself checking janitorial logs which hang on many bathroom doors. This particular bathroom had supposedly last been cleaned nearly two weeks before my appearance (by a gal by the name of Shelley). However, apart from the slight urine dilution in the toilet water, things were looking relatively tidy. Of course there were some items that a mop and soap just couldn’t fix. The toilet paper dispenser was missing its cover and the mirror was so scratched up with primitive scrawls I could hardly see myself. Upon analyzing the graffiti, the only words I could make out were "SCABS" and "CARL" which for some reason made my feel sympathetic towards Carl. The floor was clean and clear of debris and every tile on the wall was firmly in place. Quite surprising for a gas station with bulletproof glass protecting the cashier.